Earlier in April we tried to take a legit vacation. My bestie Erika, her husband Tony, and their little girl Emily, had reserved a cabin in Gatlinburg for all of us to get together. I was really excited because it has been way, way too long since we've seen each other. I've never gotten to meet her tiny human! Then, our little man decided, at the last minute, to get sick. And passed some of it to me, and some of it to David, and it was decided that it was not something to share with my bestie and her family. This means that we ended up with a stay-cation. Now, stay-cations are the norm for us. We haven't taken an "official" vacation really ever, so this was going to be a true first for us. Yet, even our stay-cations have always been very scheduled. David and I have always been very tied to our calendars. We like living by a schedule, knowing exactly where, when and why we are going to be anywhere. It's how we live the rest of our lives, it makes sense that it would follow to our vacation personalities. Google calendar has been a true godsend to our lives as it allows us to update our shared schedules in real time so we know where the other person is, where we are supposed to be, where Lucas needs to be, who needs to get him to or from somewhere, and all of this is online so that we can both reference it from our phones. The little organizer in me rejoices in this beautiful system. Both of us function with the basic belief that to be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late, and to be late is unforgivable. Well, maybe not unforgivable but you get the idea. I actually prefer to be early anywhere I'm going. It has gotten to the point that sometimes I arrive so early that I find somewhere to park to wait until it's closer to the arrival time. It stresses me out a whole bunch to be anywhere near late, especially when it's something work related. My stomach does flip flops if I show up only 5 minutes early. Therefore, parenthood was definitely an adjustment for us. Not everything ran according to our timetable (from birth on). Yet, God graced us with a son who, mostly, cooperates and even follows our crazy schedules. (Except, of course, for when he gets sick, but that's neither here nor there.) Imagine heavenly choirs singing in great joy as this light appears coming from our Google calendar app every time we open it. That's what it feels like for me. I just shiver in delightful anticipation of checking my calendar and seeing where I intend to be. Of course, with my calling as a pastor this of course has to be flexible, but even the unexpected gets put on the calendar as soon as I'm aware of it (even if it may be after the fact). All of this, then, leads back to our most recent stay-cation. After our trip to Gatlinburg ended up not happening we had no plans on the books. Once we got to feeling better, we decided to play each day by ear. Going and doing whatever felt fun or enjoyable or life-giving. If we wanted to sleep in (as much as Lucas allows us, i.e. 6:30 a.m.) we did. If we wanted to go out to eat somewhere, we did. If we thought going to the indoor bounce playland at the mall was going to be great, we did. Ice cream? Let's do it. Renting a movie from Amazon Prime just because we can? Did it. Y'all.... I'm telling you... this was a spiritual experience for us. It was freeing and I felt like a wild woman living life on the edge. Well, as much on the edge as I really ever live. Honestly, I relate to the above image on a deep level. I have questions. And I want to know when we're leaving, when we expect to arrive, where we're going, what are we doing when we get there, etc, etc, etc. (Oh, and there should definitely be food). So, upon recklessly abandoning our calendar during vacation something absolutely mind-blowing, world rocking, reality altering happened.... Wait for it... Wait for it... Keep waiting... Ok, I realize I'm not that interesting so I'll tell you. We almost missed an appointment we had made! We had arranged having coffee with someone and it wasn't until I had received a text on my way home with Lucas from the person saying: "I'm on my way" that I went: "Oh my gosh! We have an appointment!" I got home and said to David: "We're supposed to have coffee!" Thankfully, I had arranged for a sitter who happened to be running just a few minutes behind. We slid in sideways to our appointment all sorts of flustered. But afterwards... oh friends... afterwards... we felt like the biggest rebels that ever existed. We were glorious. There was chaos everywhere. Lucas was running on the ceiling, Chloe was hanging out with a pup from the wrong side of the tracks, David and I may have even had a second glass of wine... Just kidding. We didn't even have a first glass of wine. But we did feel like rebels. One of the things David said to me was "So... there are people who live their whole lives like this?" And we pondered this for longer than I care to admit. Although, we did finally acknowledge that there was something truly freeing in almost missing an appointment. Because the realization that came to me was that the world would not truly end should I be late. Have I completely changed my way of functioning? Am I now employing a laissez faire attitude toward all of life, living willy nilly from moment to moment? No. Not even a little. Sorry not sorry if that comes as a disappoint to you, but it should not really be a surprise. While I will ever and always be a Martha, I had a WHOLE lot of fun masquerading as a Mary for a few days. (Synopsis of the Scriptural story: Jesus stops in unannounced at Mary & Martha's house. Martha does all the stuff, cleaning, cooking, making sure everything is tip top. Mary sits at Jesus' feet and listens to him. Martha says, "Come on Jesus, tell Mary to help me already!" Jesus declares that Mary has chosen the better part. Seriously... Read it here: www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke+10%3A38-42&version=NRSV.) So, yeah. For a few days over an unexpected stay-cation, David and I lived the wild life of people who disconnected from their calendars and their rigid schedules and went for a walk on the wild side that leads to almost missing appointments.
But, in all seriousness, I did recognize that it might be a little healthier for me if I do let myself be a little less scheduled and a little more free-flowing with my time, especially our time off. We'll see how I do. For now, I am even more looking forward to our next stay-cation where I can experience more of this crazy little thing called, "no schedule."
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AuthorI've been Robyn for my whole life. I've been a wife for 10 years and a mom for 5 years. I've been a pastor for about 10 years. I'm still stumbling, but I'm still standing. Archives
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